WORST 10 OF 2010
10. CENTURION
10. CENTURION
Not the complete train wrecks as most on this list, this was still a huge disappointment, and a very juvenile film, more interested in showing bloody gore, instead of telling a worthwhile story. It is a shame that Michael Fassbender found himself mixed up in this mess, although Olga Kurylenko still is nice to look at. After “Doomsday” and now this, I am seriously doubting the levels of talent that I thought director Neil Marshall has in him.
9. THE EXPENDABLES
This just didn’t work on any level at all, not even as a throwback to the 80’s action film that we all loved that no longer exists. It was just terrible, which is sad, because it was a cool premise. It is funny to think that while this was being made at the same time as “Inglourious Basterds”, people were thinking that this would likely be the better film. It seems Van Damme made the right choice to pass on this. Looking forward to the sequel.
8. THE GIRL WHO PLAYED WITH FIRE
As good as “The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo” is, the sequel is just as bad. It is very dull and uninteresting, ugly to look at and it just doesn’t work, but hey, at least they still put in all that brutal violence towards women. Even Noomi Rapace’s performance as Lisbeth isn’t as good as the previous film. Worst of all, our main characters are apart for the entire film, save for the final five minutes. (Thankfully, “The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet’s Nest”, the finale of the trilogy, regained a lot of the greatness of the first film).
7. THE LOVELY BONES
After making huge blockbusters for a decade (“The Lord Of The Rings” and “King Kong”), it was nice to see Peter Jackson go back to making a small film, except it turns out that he may not be capable of going back. Instead of filming this drama about a family trying to cope with the death of their youngest daughter, Jackson filled this huge disappointment with loads of special effects, trying to turn a modest film into the kind of blockbuster that he is now used to making, and in the process he lost focus of the whole point of the story. Other reasons I hated this film were some terrible casting decisions (Whalberg and Sarandon), some truly embarrassing scenes (Sarandon doing some sort of Mrs. Doubtfire impression), the tone and pacing are completely off and this film has the most frustrating moment in a film for 2010. The scene in question is when Susie’s sister breaks into the suspected killer’s house looking for evidence, which she finds, but the killer comes home and she must flee for her life. When she gets home, her mother (who admittedly has been gone for a long time) has returned home, but instead of telling them all that she has evidence and that she was almost killed herself (not to mention call the cops), she stops and talks to mum. Give me a break! What made “The Lovely Bones” even more disappointing is that I have since re-watched Jackson’s “Heavenly Creatures”, a film that I thought this would resemble, and it is still a sublime piece of work. What a complete waste of talent.
6. ALICE IN WONDERLAND
Here is another one of my favourite directors making a terrible film. What the hell happened here, Tim Burton? After making the best film of his career with “Sweeney Todd”, he decides to follow up with a film that people have been begging him to make for years, and one that would so fit his style, and he ends up making his worst film of his career. First up, the post-conversation 3-D plain sucks, but the bigger mistake was filming the whole thing on a green screen. The film just felt so lifeless, and lacked charm, and even the great Johnny Depp couldn’t save this turkey. Actually I read a funny line regarding this film, which was “The only reason “Alice In Wonderland” even exists is because Tim Burton was sick of hearing “Planet Of The Apes” when people asked what is Burton’s worst film”. That said, I am still looking forward to “Dark Shadows”.
5. THE BLIND SIDE
I lost the will to live and total respect for the Academy Awards when they awarded Sandra Bullock the “Best Actress” award for her performance in this drivel. This was overly-sentimental garbage, that although based on a true story, felt anything but real. I hated every minute of it.
4. JONAH HEX
What the hell happened here? This is a film that doesn’t allow itself to breathe, it is like a 77 minute trailer, and it makes no sense at all. Megan Fox’s role doesn’t exist, and whose idea was it to cast Will Arnett as a straight man in this. Also, Josh Brolin, what the hell were you thinking?!? There are obvious signs of post-production tinkering, and I am sure that this was not the film that everyone thought they were making, but the released film is an absolute shocker.
3. SAW 3D
This series has become so ridiculous and convoluted that it is impossible to follow if you haven’t seen the previous films. Even if you have you are unlikely to care, as this is easily the worst of the whole series ( and supposedly the last, yeah right). You do not expect me to believe that the doctor who saws his own foot off to survive in the first film, has been helping Jigsaw since then, that is just ludicrous.
2. A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (2010)
A typically woeful remake of Wes Craven’s classic horror film, that was made with no soul or artistic merit whatsoever. It features a terrible performance from Rooney Mara as Nancy, and even the usually great Jackie Earle Haley puts in a dud performance as Freddy. It only had one visual moment that I enjoyed. When will these pointless remakes stop?! (Interestingly, I just popped in my blu-ray of the original version just to see the quality of it, and the amount of atmosphere and suspense that I felt from a random two minute scene was amazing, which is something the remake lacked completely).
1. ENTER THE VOID
This was my least favourite film at MIFF last year and it remained my least favourite film of the whole year. This is a film with huge amounts of talent behind the camera, (I have seen this at the top of a few best –of lists, it’s that kind of film), but during my MIFF review of “Enter The Void” I referred to it as “utter rubbish” and “self indulgent” and I stand by those words. The film is far too long, it definitely needed around an hour trimmed off of it, plus it was one of the ugliest looking films I have ever seen (which is surprising considering Benoit Debie did the cinematography, whose work on “The Runaways” I’ve only just praised). Normally I would say “Avoid” but because this is a love it or hate it kind of film, I suggest that you make your own mind up about it, but for me it is an absolute stinker (though I will still look forward to whatever Gaspar Noe makes next, but with caution).
BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT
GUILTY PLEASURE
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